Melancholy.

1. The guy in the supermarket that tries every other day to win on scratch cards and lottery tickets.
2. People who used to live such wonderful and flourishing lives, all over now, whether physically or situationally over.
3. Those who lived for decades just to get killed in a couple seconds.
4. The slow deterioration of everyone and everything. The slow deterioration of friendships.
5. How unforgiving time is.
6. The constant pain. How you just have to get used to it. How you just need to sleep it off or work to distract yourself from it or maybe even talk about it to someone. But it will never leave you. It will never stop hurting.
7. The loss of something or someone very dear to you. Leaving behind only memories.
8. The shame. The guilt. The stress. The feeling that you’re losing. The feeling that you won’t make it out alive.
9. How things could’ve been.
10. Remembering how innocent you were.
11. Not belonging.
12. Not having the right to complain.
13. The pressure.
14. How impossible it all seems. Your mind just hurts thinking about how to do it.
15. How you’ve tricked everyone. Tricked everyone into thinking you’re alright.
16. Those things that make you depressed just by thinking about them.
17. The lifepain.
18. Saying goodbye to someone you’ll never see ever again.