Weekly Self-Hatred Session.

I really am an insufferable piece of shit. I wouldn't want to talk to myself. I don’t belong anywhere. I’m always gonna be an outsider. Everybody has their friend groups that’s been established for years, and I know absolutely nobody. Tomorrow I’m going back to school. I won’t speak to anyone. I’ll just lie to the social worker. Nothing will happen. I will lie flat like always. I don’t deserve to be living here. Why do I have to be controlling this bag of flesh with all these privileges? There’s people way better than me living with way less, yet I complain. This bag of flesh should’ve been controlled by someone else. Pain in my legs. Great — I deserve it. It’s all so funny. Just hilarious.

I wrote that shit exactly one week ago. I have no idea what the fuck I was feeling, but I feel way better now. I'm glad I didn't do something dumb like cut myself since I'd regret doing it a couple minutes later.

dont let the intrusive thoughts get to you. keep slaying.